How do you murder people without getting caught?

[GrumpyGoomba]

Asking for a friend.

[Chemist1422]

1. Don’t

[GrumpyGoomba]

But... but... it's so fun...

[Transcender]

Asking for a friend.

Are you familiar on how to make cyanide? I know you're probs after me but I'll teach you if needed

[GrumpyGoomba]

Mmm... I believe that one method has something to do with apple seeds don't it?

[Transcender]

Mmm... I believe that one method has something to do with apple seeds don't it?

basically, take 31-32 apples (for an average person, children need far less but you should play safe, and get your apples from preferably a farm or one of those 'take a piece' fruit baskets in tesco's. If you have to you can always take out the money and go to a market.), take all their seeds and crunch them to release their nutrients. Make a smoothie with all these apple seeds (only make enough for one person). Take the leftovers and eat or put it in a compost. No evidence, no proof, no ties.

[GrumpyGoomba]

Hmm... tis a good way but I may or may not be too lazy for that.

I mean my friend. My friend is too lazy for that.

[Transcender]

Hey BasicFourLife, lemonader666, come have some apple smoothie

Hmm... tis a good way but I may or may not be too lazy for that.

I mean my friend. My friend is too lazy for that.

act like they are shots and have a drinking contest with em. they down all their poisoned one while you down the safe one. then you can have fun with it

[BS4125]

1) Use an icicle, you can never be traced back if you melt it
2) Melt the body in acid
3) Profit

[watchme1]

Wear gloves, stab person, burn body with knife. Boom you murdered someone without any fingerprints or evidence.

[Chemist1422]

Wear gloves, stab person, burn body with knife. Boom you murdered someone without any fingerprints or evidence.

I get what you mean but for a second my brain processed this as "use the knife to burn the body"

[GrumpyGoomba]

Umu umu... nice ideas. I especially like that icicle one... but it's gonna be really fkin hard to keep the icicle from melting before actually using it.

[RetsamElddir]

Hire the mafia. Have a good claim , I mean alibi. If you get jailed claim ret they will almost always let you walk away. Since the mafia helped lynch , I mean murder your intended target be sure to side with them.

[GrumpyGoomba]

But what if I claim ret and people want the guy I wanted murdered to resurrected? Won't that defeat the purpose?

[Crimson97]

Kill all the witnesses, and their families, and the people that would notice that they're missing, even the pets. Wait that's a Black Mirror episode.

[ICECLIMBERS]

hire a good lawyer

[GrumpyGoomba]

Kill all the witnesses, and their families, and the people that would notice that they're missing, even the pets. Wait that's a Black Mirror episode.

Too much work for murdering just one guy... I would rather avoid extra deaths but if they do happen to provide some entertainment in their last breaths then I can probably let it slide...

hire a good lawyer

A good lawyer can only protect me from going to jail or escaping punishment. The ideal situation I am imagining is where nobody can even make the connection that I had something to do with it.

[Transcender]

Kill all the witnesses, and their families, and the people that would notice that they're missing, even the pets. Wait that's a Black Mirror episode.

Too much work for murdering just one guy... I would rather avoid extra deaths but if they do happen to provide some entertainment in their last breaths then I can probably let it slide...

hire a good lawyer

A good lawyer can only protect me from going to jail or escaping punishment. The ideal situation I am imagining is where nobody can even make the connection that I had something to do with it.

apple smoothie boyo
apple smoothie

[GrumpyGoomba]

Mhmm... apple smoothie indeed

[Crimson97]

hire a good lawyer

[GrumpyGoomba]

Stahp flexing yer image powers yeh trusted... uh... dude.

[noveiia]

The most important aspect about not getting caught: don’t ask how to murder people on the internet.

[GrumpyGoomba]

It's not like I actually want to murder people or anything... baka.