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Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:11 am
by Crimson97
Last night I was looking for some porn of the not gay variety. Obviously gay porn is gay, so instead I went looking for guy on girl porn. But I realized that features a guy, with a penis, and is therefore 50% gay. So I started looking for some girl on girl action, till I realized that is lesbian, and is therefore 100% gay.

So clearly, I had to look into alternative options. I started to consider hentai: since no one in it is real, it can’t contain guys, so it’s not gay, right? Well, hentai is anime, which not only is gay, but also makes me a weeb. The worst option so far.

I considered traps. I’ve long heard debate over whether traps are gay, so I decided to do the math. The gayness of traps lies in the premise. Let’s consider the 5 base premises:

a guy and a trap, where the guy initially thinks he’s with a girl: effectively guy on girl, 50% gay

a guy with a trap, and the guy knew it was a trap: Dude looking for some dick, that’s gay

a girl with a trap, where the girl doesn’t know it’s a trap: that’s lesbian, and is gay

a girl with a trap, where the girl knows it’s a trap: effectively guy on girl, therefore 50% gay Therefore, on average traps are 75% gay, with a minimum gayness of 50%. Not an improvement. The 5th option, trap on trap, is a singularity of the 4 prior possibilities, and is therefore on average 75% gay again.

So I got into specifics. What if it was girl on girl, and the premise was at least one of the girls was just bi-curious, and not actually fully lesbian? Well, in that case, their curiosity makes them a cat. Cats are furries, and furries are gay

So how about a girl soloing? Well that’s a girl touching girl bits. Lesbian and gay.

My conclusion is that the only way to live a life free of homosexual sin is to liberate oneself of sexual desire at all, and become an asexual.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:15 am
by Crimson97
I regret joining this game but i regret all my life choices anyways.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:19 am
by Crimson97
I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hara-Kiri Rock. I need scissors! 61!

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:22 am
by GrumpyGoomba
Qvapil wrote:Hello guys! I'm excited to play with you zucker and goomba.

Likewise! Looking forward to it.

Guys overkill is obviously the biggest baddest scum in this game. Just get him.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:23 am
by ejjinami
Fun fact, the game shouldn’t have started, because there’s quite a chance SK hasn’t chosen their abilities yet and by starting the game the players have a chance to influence their choice.
(I'm not SK xd)
And yeah, I know I’m just being an ass rn

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:24 am
by ejjinami
Rickdaily12 wrote:Still feel like I'm going to regret joining this game.

Zucker wrote:I flipped Citizen! ^_^
Good luck everyone!

I'm definitely going to need plenty of images and sigh.gifs this game as well. Hey, Zucker, have a gift:

Spoiler:
Rickdaily12 wrote:Avoid claiming your role. There are other ways to avoid getting yourself killed, which this guide will touch upon later. All claiming your role does if you survive this attempt on your life is tell the Scum who to screw around with if you live, and who to blame for your death if you die.
When you claim your role, know that unless you are a role that can self-confirm by the next Day Phase, Scum can be in your shoes lying about who they are.
So claiming your role in these cases is counterproductive, as it wouldn't change by itself if you're telling the truth, and Scum can use this information against you later.
If you ARE a role that can self-confirm, then shame on you. Mishandling yourself to try to draw Town into lynching you is NOT a good play. Don't do this.
Claiming your role will hurt the Town if Witch is alive; if there isn't one, confusing other Town into wanting to kill you is still bad play.

/pat

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:25 am
by GrumpyGoomba
Being an ass is bad. People shouldn't be ass.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:26 am
by ejjinami
yeah, listen to crimson, sexuality is bad. KILL ASSES WITH FIRE! >:D

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:26 am
by Crimson97
ejjinami wrote:Fun fact, the game shouldn’t have started, because there’s quite a chance SK hasn’t chosen their abilities yet and by starting the game the players have a chance to influence their choice.
(I'm not SK xd)
And yeah, I know I’m just being an ass rn

Stop, i'm already angleshooting thanks to this.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:28 am
by ejjinami
Uzay is acting really townie rn btw

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:29 am
by ejjinami
Crimson97 wrote:
ejjinami wrote:Fun fact, the game shouldn’t have started, because there’s quite a chance SK hasn’t chosen their abilities yet and by starting the game the players have a chance to influence their choice.
(I'm not SK xd)
And yeah, I know I’m just being an ass rn

Stop, i'm already angleshooting thanks to this.

Qvapil wrote:
Crimson97 wrote:
ejjinami wrote:Fun fact, the game shouldn’t have started, because there’s quite a chance SK hasn’t chosen their abilities yet and by starting the game the players have a chance to influence their choice.
(I'm not SK xd)
And yeah, I know I’m just being an ass rn

Stop, i'm already angleshooting thanks to this.


I'm not entirely sure what angleshooting is, but I think I'm doing the same.

actually, idk how would you angleshoot based on sth like this, but ok

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:29 am
by GrumpyGoomba
Mhh so many terms that I don't have any idea what they mean... tragic.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:29 am
by ejjinami
Dash2 wrote:Imagine admitting to breaking the rules.

impossible

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:30 am
by ejjinami
Qvapil wrote:It obviously stands for Over Makes Gravely Unwinnable Setups.

hahahahaha, townie

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:30 am
by Crimson97
Qvapil wrote:
Crimson97 wrote:
ejjinami wrote:Fun fact, the game shouldn’t have started, because there’s quite a chance SK hasn’t chosen their abilities yet and by starting the game the players have a chance to influence their choice.
(I'm not SK xd)
And yeah, I know I’m just being an ass rn

Stop, i'm already angleshooting thanks to this.


I'm not entirely sure what angleshooting is, but I think I'm doing the same.

Remember when you asked me on mafia chat if it was against the rules to read Noping's slot as scum because they replaced out and there was no nightskip? That's angleshooting and it's bad.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:30 am
by ejjinami
/vote grumpynotacat

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:32 am
by GrumpyGoomba
ejjinami wrote:/vote grumpynotacat

Excuse me?! I take serious offense to that. You just called a goomba a 'notacat'. That's seriously Catist of you.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:37 am
by Crimson97
ejjinami wrote:Uzay is acting really townie rn btw

Not really.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:48 am
by TheDebil
Spoiler: Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:49 am
by Rickdaily12
GrumpyGoomba wrote:
ejjinami wrote:/vote grumpynotacat

Excuse me?! I take serious offense to that. You just called a goomba a 'notacat'. That's seriously Catist of you.

Don't. You're basically daring her to spam 50+ different kitten gifs in retaliation while hungrily demanding your head as tribute. Trust me, she WILL do it.

Crimson97 wrote:
ejjinami wrote:Uzay is acting really townie rn btw

Not really.

I can't take either of these seriously. We're still in the first few pages and hours of the game, isn't everything basically still NAI?

Qvapil wrote:
UzayAltay wrote:
Qvapil wrote:Hello guys! I'm excited to play with you zucker and goomba.

We found our Maf-team.
/vote Qvapil


OMGUS
/vote Uzay

Qvapil wrote:Jk, if not obvious. I can't even judge it.

I really hope this was what you meant that you were jk in response to. =/

TheDebil wrote: Spoiler: Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.

Wait, are you even in this game? Last I checked you were a backup?

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:51 am
by 0verki11
im allowing backups to post so it shows up in view your posts.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:51 am
by Crimson97
Debil you don't exist in this reality yet.

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:51 am
by ejjinami
GrumpyGoomba wrote:
ejjinami wrote:/vote grumpynotacat

Excuse me?! I take serious offense to that. You just called a goomba a 'notacat'. That's seriously Catist of you.

hey, kitty~ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
do you prefer town or scum?

better?

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:52 am
by Rickdaily12
0verki11 wrote:im allowing backups to post so it shows up in view your posts.

I see...

DEBIL IS LOCK SCUM FOR THAT ENTRY CHANGE MY MIND

Re: VFM 49: Day 1

PostPosted: Mon May 13, 2019 1:52 am
by Crimson97
Rickdaily12 wrote:
Crimson97 wrote:
ejjinami wrote:Uzay is acting really townie rn btw

Not really.

I can't take either of these seriously. We're still in the first few pages and hours of the game, isn't everything basically still NAI?

Exactly.